6 Band Writing Task 2 With Explanation

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It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience.

You should write at least 250 words.

 

Explanation

This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 6 score. Here is the examiner’s comment:
The answer is an adequate response to the task, although there are not many ideas and there is little
development of these. The response reads fairly easily, however, and the writer’s intention is
usually clear. There is a variety of sentence structures, and although these are not always
grammatically accurate, the errors do not interfere with the message. There are signs of vocabulary
limitations.

SAMPLE ANSWER

The today’s family-life changed a lot. Many parents are divorce, a lot of mothers and fathers have their job’s far away from home. The children are often alone and lonley… but what are the reasons for this happening?

First of all, I think that the modern technology is one of the main reason for this problem. Many parents work in their nearest cities from their home. They work with computer in big offices and came home late at night. However, they have no time to look after their children.

In the past, families used to work “as a family”. Every member worked hard and helped the family to survife, for example farmers. Furthermore, the education used to be controled by the parents, not like today’s day-schools with teachers and professors. On the other hand, there must be a solution to bring separeted families together. At my point of view, families should spend their free time together. I am thinking about weekends or the time after work. Children need their parents even when they are older. To give a reasonable example: I often go out with my parents,
mostly for a dinner. Then my brother and I speak about our future plans or something else. An intensiv conversation is a possible solution. A similar way is, to divide your job into half-part work-times and spend your free time leftover with your loved persons. A point against this statement is to have financial problems.

To sum up I wish that every family is as close as possible with each other, if they like that.

 

Source: Cambridge IELTS 3

 

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July 16, 2021

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